Making A Pandemic Collage Prayer Book 2020

Springtime 2020.  We are all under the "Shelter in Place" orders because of the Pandemic, and missing each other right now, especially as we enter into this Holy Week leading up to Easter.  I have been trying to do some creative things as I am spending extra time alone, to help me process my feelings and longings during this COVID 19 crisis.  So I want to invite you to join me during the next couple weeks to make a special 2-sided collage that will turn into a little book.   I think it will help us process our solidarity with Jesus, and other people around the world, during Holy Week and Easter season.

Some of you did a similar process with me last year during our November 2019 Inner Artist Retreat.  

This is something very simple that you could also do with your children or grandchildren if you are at home with them.  

I don't have fancy technology to do a video or tutorial, but I will try to just talk you through this process. 

 supplies needed:

- 1 large sheet of paper.  Ideal size is 12 x 18 inches.  Ideal paper weight is about 100 pounds paper weight (or less) if you have it, but you can be creative and just use whatever you have at home, or whatever you can find.  I think that you could even use a paper advertisement that comes in the mail for groceries, etc.  The exact size is not important, just try  to make it as large as possible.  

- Mod Podge or watered down glue like Elmer's.  Glue sticks won't work for this project because you need to glue down paper images thoroughly all the way to the edges.  

- a brush to apply the glue.  Use whatever you have.  About 1" size brush is ideal. 

- several old magazines, newspapers, etc.  

- scissors for paper cutting

Process:

Spend a little time looking through the magazines and newspapers.  Tear out or cut out images that make you feel sad, or that represent loss, pain, disappointment, fear, scarcity, etc. Put them in one pile.  Then tear out or cut out images that make you feel hopeful, happy, joyful, grateful, that show compassion, caring, love, abundance.  Put them in another pile.

 Here is my 12 x 18 paper, ready to begin.  My pile of "sad" images is on the left, and my pile of "happy" images is on the right.  

Begin to arrange and glue the "sad" images on one side of your large sheet of paper.  And after it dries, turn it over.  Begin to arrange and glue the "happy" images on the other side.    Take your time.   As you work on this project for the next couple weeks, be on the lookout for images and keep adding them to your collage.  Try to cover the paper entirely with images on both sides.  You could also draw, paint, or doodle images and words that have meaning. Remember to keep one side for "Sad" images and the other side for "Happy" images.  

Glue images to paper with thinned Mod-Podge.  You can also use thinned Elmer's or something like that. (Thin with water to make it easy to spread, like thinned paint.) Be sure to glue the images all the way to the edges.  It will look best if you completely cover the paper with your images.  After you complete one side, flip your paper over and do the other side.  The paper will probably curl up on the first side, but it will lay down as you begin side 2. 

This is my completed "SAD" side.

  This is my completed "HAPPY" side.  

Let your 2 sided collage COMPLETELY DRY overnight before beginning to fold and make the collage into a book.  Your collage will not be flat at this point, but don't worry, because you can press the paper flat after you assemble the book.

Take time to sit with your collage before you begin the book assembly.   What is it 'saying' to you?  If you live with someone, show them your collage and explain what the images represent.  Telling the story of your collage out loud will help  the meaning unfold for you. 

The next phase is to FOLD the dried collage to form a book  6 x 4.5 inch size.

 Fold the paper across the wide side, to form a 6 x 18 size.

Try to line up the sides and edges the best you can.  

Use a rolling pin, or a wine bottle, or the edge of a spoon to press the folded edge as flat as possible.   

Fold again left to right, to make a 6 x 9 size, pressing the folded edges firmly flat again.

Fold one last time, left to right, to make 6 x 4.5 size.  

Your book is now folded into final size.  Be sure to press or roll all the folded edges as flat as possible.  

We have now folded our 2 sided 12 x 18 collage to make a 6 x 4.5 book.

Here is another view of the folded collage so you can see how it folds together. The folded edge is at the top.   

The next step is to sew the spine of the book so we can cut the pages apart.

First, using an awl, or the tip of a very sharp knife, or maybe a nail, carefully punch 5 small holes down the center fold of the book.   You are going through 4 layers of paper, so be careful and press firmly.  

Here is a sketch to show the hole placement:

One hole should be centered, then evenly space 2 holes above and 2 holes below.  ( spacing the holes 1 inch apart is ideal)  Now we sew the spine of the book together.  

I used waxed linen twine to sew my book spine.  You probably do not have that at home,  so you can substitute any thick strong thread.  Since we are doing this during the Pandemic, most craft supply stores are closed, so we will need to be creative about this.  Silk beading twine, embroidery floss, thin leather lacing, shoe lacing, strong yarn, twine, or even thick waxed dental floss might work.   You need about 20 inches of twine for the book spine.  Thread your twine through the largest needle you have. (I used a tapestry needle with a large eye)

Start at the bottom hole,weaving your needle and twine in and out of the holes to the top, then come back down through the holes.  Leave 2 pieces of twine (several inches each) at the bottom of the book.  You will tie a knot in the twine after you have cut open the pages and trimmed the edges. 

this photo shows the sewn spine of book. 

Now use your scissors to carefully cut open the pages that are folded.  

After all the pages are cut, you can trim the pages to make them as even as possible. 

The final steps will be Book Finishing. 

After your pages are cut open and trimmed with scissors, 

Tie a knot in the twine at the bottom of your book.  If you want to, you can slide a bead or 2 onto the twine for decoration.  Beads are optional.  

  The next step is painting the edges of the pages with acrylic paint.  This will help seal the cut edges and it also gives your book a finished look.  The pages will not be perfectly cut, but that it part of the handmade quality of your book.  You can use any color, but  I used metallic silver acrylic paint on the page edges of this book.   Painting the edges is optional but I think it gives a nice finish.

 After the painted page edges are dry, carefully pierce 2 holes on the front cover in the center, about 1 inch from the right side.  

Sew a button with 2 holes on with twine.   A shell or horn button looks especially nice to me for this book.  

Use about 20 inches of twine to loop around the center of your book spine twine, then wrap it around the button to close the book.  You can slide on a bead between knots at the end of for decoration if desired. 

This shows the finished book with the twine opened

  Here is my finished book with the twine wrapped around the button closure in the front. 

  

Now comes the revealing part...

Take time during the next few weeks to "read" through your book each day.  You will notice many things.

It is not perfect.  The images have some imperfections, bubbles and wrinkles, and the pages are not cut perfectly.  Some of the images and words are cut off and some of them are upside down.  It does not look like you thought it would look.  And now that is is finished, you can see how the "sad" images are mixed with the "happy" images.  So it is a metaphor for life...a mixture of surprises and things we cannot control.  But there is beauty mixed with the pain.  You might want to look up the term "wabi-sabi".  How can you find beauty within the imperfections and disappointments in life?

I noticed an interesting thing about my book.  I had glued the words "rest assured" on my collage but after I folded it into the  book and cut open the folded pages, my cover now says "st assured" upside down.  At first it bothered me.  After sitting with it since yesterday, it now says "saint assured" to me.  So that is my challenge.  To remember those  who have lived before me and survived lots of hardship, and yet they remained calm and assured.  All shall be well.

PS:  The week after my book  was finished, I decided to add this prayer poem that was written by Christine Valters Paintner from AbbeyOfTheArts.com: 

Praise Song for the Pandemic*  

Praise be the nurses and doctors, every medical staff bent over flesh to offer care, for lives saved and lives lost, for showing up either way,

Praise for the farmers, tilling soil, planting seeds so food can grow, an act of hope if ever there was, 

Praise be the janitors and garbage collectors, the grocery store clerks, and the truck drivers barreling through long quiet nights,

Give thanks for bus drivers, delivery persons, postal workers, and all those keeping an eye

on water, gas, and electricity,

Blessings on our leaders, making hard choices for the common good, offering words of assurance,

Celebrate the scientists, working away to understand the thing that plagues us, to find an antidote, all the medicine makers, praise be the journalists keeping us informed,

Praise be the teachers, finding new ways to educate students from afar, and blessings on parents holding it together for them, 

Blessed are the elderly and those with weakened immune systems, all those who worry for their health, praise for those who stay at home to protect them,

Blessed are the domestic violence victims, on lock down with abusers, the homeless and refugees, 

Praise for the poets and artists, the singers and storytellers, all those who nourish with words and sound and color,

Blessed are the ministers and therapists of every kind, bringing words of comfort, 

Blessed are the ones whose jobs are lost, who have no savings, who feel fear of the unknown gnawing,

Blessed are those in grief, especially who mourn alone, blessed are those who have passed into the Great Night, 

Praise for police and firefighters, ambulance drivers, and all who work to keep us safe, praise for all the workers and caregivers of every kind, 

Praise for the sound of notifications, messages from friends reaching across the distance,

Praise be our four-footed companions, with no forethought or anxiety, responding only in love, 

Praise for the seas and rivers, forests and stones who teach us to endure,

Give thanks for your ancestors, for the wars and plagues they endured and survived, their resilience is in your bones, your blood,

Praise every moment of stillness and silence, so new voices can be heard, praise the chance at slowness,

Praise be the birds who continue to sing the sky awake each day, praise for the primrose poking yellow petals from dark earth,

Blessed are the dolphins returning to Venice canals, the sky clearing overhead so one day

we can breathe deeply again, 

And when this has passed may we say that love spread more quickly than any virus ever could, may we say this was not just an ending but also a place to begin.

by Christine Valters Paintner, Abbey of the Arts * a work in progress.

written March 2020

If you want to add the poem to your collage book, Christine has given permission to use it, just include her name as the author. 

I printed the poem in phrases that would fit on my book pages, cut it apart and glued it on my collage pages.  Here are a couple final finished page examples with Christine's prayer poem:

So now, my little Pandemic Collage book project has become a PANDEMIC PRAYER BOOK with even deeper meaning than it did before I added Christine's prayer poem to the pages.  I have been reading through it daily, using Christine's poem as a guide to pray for all of us around the world as we are seeking to support each other during this time of liminal space.  When this pandemic is over, I will keep this book as a reminder of these weeks during the Spring of 2020.

Thank you for your interest in this project.  If you finish a book, please send me a photo and your impressions. I would love to hear from you.

EASTER WEEK 2020  STATIONS OF THE CROSS Pandemic book.

I enjoyed the book process so much, that after I finished making my little Pandemic Collage Prayer Book, I made another kind of book during Holy Week leading up to Easter.  There were so many newspaper articles written about the COVID-19 Pandemic, and the overwhelming sadness of it all this year helped me feel solidarity with Jesus in his final hours.  So I made a couple STATIONS OF THE CROSS books.  (I gave one to a friend.)
These books were made very similar to the Pandemic books, but since it was not a collage, It was a more simple process:

supplies needed:

-  my book used 8 sheets of paper, 6 inches tall x 9 inches wide.  Ideal paper weight is about 100 pounds paper weight (or less)  You can make your book as many pages thick as you want to, but since I was using the 14 Stations of the Cross, I needed 8 pieces of paper.

- Mod Podge or watered down glue like Elmer's.  

- a brush to apply the glue.  Use whatever you have.  About 1" size brush is ideal. 

- several  newspapers. 

- scissors for paper cutting

- watercolor and brush

I didn't make photos of my process, but I simply glued newspaper articles and editorial cartoons, etc, on both sides of my sheets of paper to completely cover it.  After it dried thoroughly overnight, I trimmed the edges.  I folded each piece of paper to make pages that were 6" tall and 4.5" wide.  I followed the same procedure as the book above, piercing holes down the center fold, sewing the pages together, trimming the final pages to make the book look pleasing, painting the edges of each page with acrylic paint, sewing a button on the front cover page and tying beads on the twine.

After I finished the book assembly, I typed and printed prayers and reflection thoughts about the Stations of the Cross and how it relates to the current pandemic. After gluing them on the pages, I watercolored each page until it felt finished.

Here are a couple finished pages:

This is a view of the center page showing the sewn binding down the center fold.  9 inches wide and 6 inches tall, so each page is only 4.5 inches wide. 

This is a view of the cover showing the binding down the center spine and the button closure and twine that I use to wrap around the button for closure. 

This is a close up that shows you the binding.  

These are the 2 finished book covers again:

This book is very meaningful for me, especially during this Easter time.  I understood the Passion this year in a new way.  I love the bookmaking process.  It is very time consuming and meditative.  The final product reveals layered meanings as I "read" the book. 
You could make a pandemic journal using newspaper for the background and glue plain paper on each page to write on.  Or make a pandemic scrapbook of interesting poems and prayers, etc that are meaningful for you during this pandemic. 

Thank you for looking at my projects.  Creativity is my outlet and it makes my heart sing, even during these times of sadness and grief. 
-stay safe and healthy until we can journey again,
from Audrey

Catching up since December 2018

April 2020
                                               

Wow, it is impossible to believe that 16 months have passed since my last entry in December 2018.  But so many things have happened.   I am writing this during our COVID-19 Pandemic.  Most travel and scheduled activity has temporarily stopped.  So far, I am healthy and everybody I know is healthy, so I am thankful for that.  I think I am fortunate to live in an area of the USA that has not had a huge amount of virus cases.  We are all praying that it decreases soon.  This is week 4 of "shelter in place" here in North Carolina.  It has been a "liminal" time of adjustment.  I am glad I learned to be comfortable with stillness, silence, and solitude before this happened.  And I am thankful for springtime and sunshine because I have been able to enjoy digging in the dirt and going for outdoor walks.  I have great neighbors and the time is passing quickly.
So, what in the world have I been doing since December 2018? 
                                           

-I continue to volunteer as the host for Quiet Space Fridays, which is a monthly silence retreat at Starrette Farm Retreat Center in Statesville, NC. https://www.thelydiagroup.com/quiet-space-fridays

And in February 2019, I started hosting a new retreat there called The Inner Artist 4 times a year, with a friend, Roxanne Morgan.  It has been a lot of work and wonderful fun and very rewarding. Creativity feeds my soul.  More about that another time. https://www.thelydiagroup.com/the-inner-artist

I am also still in formation as a Benedictine Oblate.  This year I began my official formation process with Queen of Peace Monastery in Rutherfordton, NC.  More about that another time. 

                                   


In August 2019, I started facilitating a weekly Centering Prayer Community Group on the campus of Lenoir Rhyne University here in Hickory, NC.  More about that another time.
                                       


Last summer, my cousin, Linda Odom, and I went to Scotland, England, Wales, and Ireland on another 5 week pilgrimage that was amazing.   More about that another time.
                                  


When I returned from that trip, I started going to a wonderful yoga class at a nearby neighborhood church, St Albans Episcopal, and started attending the worship there.  So I am making new friends and finding a new church home here in Hickory, NC.  Life is full of surprises.  And it is very good.
                                


A follow up on my last entry: back in the Fall of 2018, after my experience at Lutheridge Conference Center,  I heard about a Spiritual Direction Certification from 4 different people within a week. This 2 year certification is through Lenoir Rhyne's Lutheran Southern Seminary in Columbia, SC.  I started exploring it, said YES,  and started the program as a student a few months ago.  More about that another time.  
                               


 God just keeps opening doors!  More about that next time....
Until then, I am on this amazing journey of life. All is well. 
In The Deep Peace, Audrey 
                                              

Growing in New Ways this Fall

A couple years ago, when I started on this journey, I heard God, loud and clear, telling me He
would open doors if I would be willing to walk through them.  So, I have been having wonderful adventures ever since.

This Fall, a new opportunity came.  A dear friend and spiritual mentor had been scheduled to speak at a conference at Lutheridge, which is a Lutheran Conference center near Asheville, NC.   Months earlier, she had invited me to go along, as a traveling companion.   But several weeks before the event, a family emergency kept her from going.  So she asked me to fill in for her.  My first reaction was:  "OH, NO!  I can't do that.  Public speaking?  In front of paying guests?  No way.  I'm not qualified to do it." But as I thought about her plight, I knew the time was short and it was too late to find someone new to take her place.  So I reluctantly assured her that I would do my best and honored to relieve her of the responsibility.
The topic was "TRAVELING LIGHT, DWELLING DEEP".  About how to simplify your spiritual life to experience more Sabbath and quiet time with God.  No  problem, right?
Then the event approached, closer and closer, and I  started feeling less and less sure of myself.  All the "what if's" started filling my mind.   Doubt, fear, panic, despair, all negative thoughts.
But still I moved forward and planned my presentation.  I was using my friend's notes and props.  All I had to do was follow her outline, right?
As God would have it, a  few days before the event, I went on a pre-scheduled retreat to the Valle Crucis Hermitages, with a good friend. 

It was wonderful and restful.  The final night, I did my presentation as a test-run for my friend.  It was awful.  Terrible.  Did not work at all.  I went to bed that night with dread.  It was too late to start over.  The conference started the next day. And I was driving there directly from my retreat, so no time for new props or new handouts or time to start over.  I prayed that night for God to help me.  I was in big trouble.

The next morning, I woke up knowing the answer: "Don't try to do my mentor's presentation.  Just tell my own story.  Share what works for me."  I knew that was correct.

So I drove to Lutheridge, set up my room, and learned that the attendance was going to be less than previously expected, so there was no need for a microphone or podium.   Good.   I simplified everything, made a small circle of chairs, put my props in the floor and simply sat in the circle with the attendees and told them what works for me.  Very relaxed and honest. And it was OK.  I knew God was with me, giving me confidence and courage. 

It was a big learning experience for me.  First, I know I just need to be myself. And second, I need to just tell my own story.   And hopefully, something I say or something I share will resonate with somebody.  It's not about me.  I am just a conduit for God to flow through.
I am on a journey and the end is not in sight.  So I am moving forward on this long and winding road. It's good, and I am not alone.

Till next time,
Deep peace from Audrey in North Carolina.

What in the world am I doing here? Finding Silence at Quiet Space Friday

Hi!  Immediately after I returned from 6 weeks in England this summer, I started a new volunteer job, hosting a monthly retreat day at Starrette Farm Retreat Center in Statesville, NC.

This is a daytime retreat called Quiet Space Friday. It has been held for about 13 years on the second Friday of the month.  I am very honored to host this now, for the owners, Ann and Tom Starrette.   I am grateful for this wonderful opportunity for ministry that God has opened for me.

The idea for this retreat is to set aside a day to get away from everything that distracts us, like noise and TV and phones and media. We all stay so busy these days and are surrounded by so much stimulation, that intentionally setting aside an occasional day for silence helps to re-calibrate us back to our center.  Our goal is to provide a gentle, refreshing day so our guests can rest and enter silence, and connect with God.

Quiet Space Fridays are days of silence where the guests can come rest, based on the pattern of Jesus, who frequently withdrew to a quiet place to nourish is spirit.  On these days, we encounter God in community, yet alone, surrounded by the beauty of nature and the healing rhythm of sacred quiet.
Many people bring a notebook for journaling.  Lots of reading material is available  in the Retreat House.

The private Starrette Farm Retreat Center is beautiful, spanning 50 acres of rolling woodland just outside Statesville, NC.

Guests can settle in to a chair by a window

or write at a desk, take a walk outside in the woods to be immersed in nature, sit on the decks in the sun,

walk our 7-circuit labyrinth, sit on a bench in the shade, or relax beside the pond.

Starrette Farm is also a member of the worldwide Quiet Garden Movement. 

 I feel a connection with my friends in England because the Scargill Community is also part of this association.  The Quiet Garden Movement nurtures access to outdoor spaces for prayer, contemplation, rest, and inspiration.

My job as hostess is to manage the registrations each month, contact the guests by email before arrival, and be present at the retreat center to help everyone get settled in, answer any questions that might come up, and pray for the guests during the day.  And generally be quietly available as needed.

Everyone loves coming to Starrette Farm.  You can feel yourself begin to relax as soon as you turn onto the gravel drive that winds past the white fence, and down through the woods.  We are so fortunate to be able to experience this beautiful place that Ann and Tom Starrette have so lovingly designed and generously planned as a quiet place of sanctuary for their guests.

You can read more about it and even register online at this website: https://www.thelydiagroup.com/quiet-space-fridays/
There is also a downloadable brochure you can link to from that website.

If you want to contact me directly about Quiet Space Fridays, you can email me at QuietSpaceFridays@gmail.com.
Till next time,
Deep Peace to you,
from Audrey Brendel in North Carolina